Blame me for the jealousy and deceit
For wanting to be something that I’m not
To stare at the mirror blankly
At a creature that I can’t recognize
Blood and vomit is my therapy
Hacking away to a buried beauty
All that’s left are hunks of fat and misery
Condolences to the ignorant who know no restraint
I’m stuck forever in lard and lies
Denying the possibility that I’m to blame
Yet as egregious as it is, I deride
Behavior that’s taken on a life of its own.
Gluttony is a grave sin, but to me
It’s nothing more than a guilty indulgence that’s grown
Into a crutch that will snap, guaranteeing
A funeral in an ill-fitted piano box
Or a gallon of gasoline in a kiddie pool.
Toss my ashes into the desert;
It’ll be easier than staring at my deceit.